what's a best friend for real???

well.....i really dont have friends..i would call them associates. just like you i feel the same way when it comes to them calling me, caring about my issues ect. i thought it was me but i just found out that they are just bullshitty friends. but i do have one best friend. hes a guy and listens to me. i mean he just sits there while i vent and its amazing because he really does help. although we dont see each other alot, we do send emails to each other all the time. Im actaully really comfortable arounf him and vice versa. i guess you have to keep looking for that one person who would be there for you in the end....

I don't feel as though I have friends anymore either. I no longer work or go to bars, concerts or any of the places that gave me the opportunity to meet people. Since most "friendships" are superficial anyway when your no l onger any fun the phone calls stop. Thats why I call people aquaintances. But even when I did have friends, I was the one always calling to do stuff together & check on them if they were having problems. No one was ever invested in me as much as I was them. That kind of hurts, you know?

CC

it does hurt - i know. i am sorry

you will be lucky to have 5 close freinds your entire life. I say 5 because that all you might have time for and you only have 5 fingers to count on one hand. My BF has been there for me for the past 21 years. she hardley ever call sme, but i call her everyday. yes every day. she is part of my family and i talk to her like i talk to my mom and sister, actually all my close friends i have to call them, but its ok cause they talk to me for an hour. yes they are out there and i just happen to be the lucky one that surrounds herself with positive women.

truly close friends or best friends are rare. I have 1 best friend and she is there for me and me for her, even if weeks pass by without us actually talking. We e-mail and write letters to each other and rarely talk on the phone. She only lives an hour or so from me, but our lives are so busy that this works for us. I have chronic anxiety and have a lot of trouble talking on the phone and she doesn't text. But she loves me and understands and supports me! I hope you can find a friend like I have...I call her Sis!

truly close friends or best friends are rare. I have 1 best friend and she is there for me and me for her, even if weeks pass by without us actually talking. We e-mail and write letters to each other and rarely talk on the phone. She only lives an hour or so from me, but our lives are so busy that this works for us. I have chronic anxiety and have a lot of trouble talking on the phone and she doesn't text. But she loves me and understands and supports me! I hope you can find a friend like I have...I call her Sis!

My best friend and I live states away and rarely get to see each other. We don’t talk often because of our busy schedules. But he remains my best friend because he is always there to support me when I need him. It doesn’t matter if it is late at night and he has work in the morning, he is always there for me. I know we would do anything for each other. He saved my life once and that created a bond that I can’t ever see breaking. His girlfriend and I have even chosen to become sisters. We’re all family now, even though we rarely get to talk.

I guess true and close friends are rare. One does not want to be without the other because they know that would equal = lonliness. There is nothing wrong with friend's or acquaintances but close friend's make sure they stay in touch. There is also that special chemistry, nothing complicated, that makes for a good old fashion and genuine close friendship. Yes, ... they are rare .... and "Priceless."

I'm so glad that I joined this group & saw these posts. I had my third hip surgery about 7 months ago and my so called friends have been no where to be found. Not even phone calls. It has been totally upsetting and depressing. In addition to the constant pain that I am experiencing and the fact that I may never be able to work again I feel completely abandoned. I consider myself to be a giving loyal honest person and ready to do anything for friends and often acquaintances or even strangers. I am a nurse so that by definition leads to caring and compassion. It's very hard to be treated this way and I have even begun to blame myself. I would love "real" friends that I could actually have "real" friendships with.